11102 us hwy 50
Las Animas Colorado 81054
October 26, 2010
Mr. Nickell
300 Grove Ave
Las Animas Colorado 81054
Dear Mr.Nickell:
As a freshman at Las Animas High School only being in high school for about three months I have noticed some places in the school that need to be changed. Although, im
only going to mention one. I think we should have air conditioning in the gymnasium because more people will come to the games and actually stay for the boy’s basketball games and not just leave when the girls are finished. Also people will be a lot more relaxed. And more players would be able to play better if it’s cool in the gym. The gym would even have a better smell and wouldn’t be as humid as it usually is. And in the summer kids can’t practice because it’s so hot in the gym so therefore we could have more summer practices. If we had air conditioning we could actually shut the gym doors during gym class so it won’t disrupt the other classes, and it wouldn’t be much of a problem because it would be nice in the gym.
Some of the bad things about getting air conditioning are that it would cost a lot of money and cold air can injure kids because their body needs to be warm so that they are loose and ready to play whatever sport it is. Also when would this happen we don’t know when it would happen or if it even will. And last some people would maybe disagree with getting air in the gym because they may want it somewhere else. I do have Mr. Armstrong 4th hour and i have an email address acelynnratzlaff@yahoo.com if you need to contact me. Thank you for your time and being able to read my suggestions.
Sincerely yours,
Acelynn Ratzlaff
why do we want air conditioning in the gym in the winter when its freezing outside and it does make sense for the summer but we only have like 2 months were its actually hot so it seems kind of pointless.
ReplyDeletei like your letter but, i have to disagree with you on your request. it would be easier to pull muscules. and we take showers any way so it wouldnt matter.
ReplyDeletei like how you started your letter. i really think they willlook into getting airconditioning in the gym because the more people that show up the more money you make off the games because the cooler it is in the gym the better the game would be. alot of people would be happy to come and watch family and friends play while sitting in a cool gym instead of sitting there sweating. i think it would be a wonderful thing to do because that is more money the school gets then we already make from our games.
ReplyDeleteNice Acelynn I completely agree. However you could suggest we get warm ups for our players like all the other schools have to help keep them loose and everything so they would be ready to play. Also if you had a set medium that with all the people crammed in there and the air conditioning going on it would actually be quite nice to be a spectator.
ReplyDeleteAcelynn,
ReplyDeleteLooking specifically at your format and your argument's validity, make sure all grammar errors are corrected on your final draft. The little errors such as not capitalizing US and Hwy in the first lines may be minute now, but they are the first impression your audience has of you.
Secondly, your first paragraph is a list of reasons why the AC would be a good idea. Choose two or three of those reasons and explain them, don't merely list them. You will only have a few, but they will be stronger if you explain.
Lastly, I think you have two paragraphs here, but I can't really tell due to the Blogger format. So, make sure you have three paragraphs: 1. State argument and benefits, 2. Disadvantages but spin them to work for you, and 3. Conclude by restating your argument, the contact info is good, and thanking them for taking the time to read your work.
Can't wait to read your final draft!
Mr. Armstrong